Monday, May 31, 2010

Me and ... The Fat Machine

Once a week, i work at the office. Either to prepare my week of cruise ships during the busy season or to cover for colleagues on their day off during the low season. Problem of the low season is that it's exactly that: LOW.
Low meaning that it is slow, that there is next to nothing to do but you still have to sit there for 8 hours and i probably said that a million times already but i get bored easily. And when i'm bored, i do the worse thing to do: i eat.
Last day i was in the office, it was on Saturday. Since my car so nicely broke down the day before, i had to take the bus to get there. And since i am now living in a complete different area than before, i wasnt too sure about how long it'd take me to get there by bus, especially since i had a transfer to do. So i had breakfast at like 6am, hopped in the bus at 7am and got there at 7:45am. Not bad. I mean, 45 minutes in public transport to get to work, there is a lot of people who do that every single day, and for some, it's more like 1.5 hours to get there. So yeah, that was good.

Upon arrival, since there is a breakfast table set up for guests who are going on tour, i helped myself with a coffee and a sweet bread. Problem is, by 10am i was already starving. And they dont serve food in the canteen before 1pm. And generally on Saturday and Sunday, it is some horrendous tongue tacos or shit like that that i will not eat anyway. But still. There's always some kinda salad i can calm my stomach with.

When it was 11am, it was obvious that i wasnt gonna make it until lunch time so i went to our (in)famous fat machine. The fat machine is a vending machine that we have in the premises. It is actually a big ass one since there is  window for junk food and another window for pop. Why the fat machine? Cuz let's be honest, nothing that comes out of there is remotedly healthy. You have a selection of crisps, a selection of chocolate bars, a selection of cookies, a selection of cakes and ONE variety of cereal bar. And on the drink side, you have all the selection of sodas you can dream of and ONE juice option, option that is not the best either, considering that it is a juice made of concentrate hence full of sugar. So there. The explanation of the name "fat machine" (we also have fat plaza, a mall with all kind of food stands but where we only go to stuff ourselves with burgers and fries from McDonalds)

So back to our story. It's Saturday. It's low season. It's DEAD. It's 11am and I am starving. So direction: FAT MACHINE. Since i always get the same stuff, i know exactly how much i'll spend (15 pesos) but that day, i only had 20 pesos. So there i am, select product, C4, insert money, 7 pesos, slip my 10 pesos coin in, cookies fall, and then i'm waiting for my change of 3 pesos.
For those not familiar with Mexican money, 3 pesos change can be handled back with 3 coins of 1 or 1 coin of 2 and 1 coin of 1.
Well, fat machine didnt have 2 pesos coins that day so it spat me 3 coins of 1. And yeah, you read it right, bloody machine SPAT OUT the coins at me. I mean WTF? What kind of vending machine DOES that? What kind of vending machine throws the change at you? And i mean it throws it pretty damn far on top of that. And since the change box is located at the bottom of the machine, it spits the coins right into your knees.

I was in shock. Not too sure how to react either. If laughing or running away. Really doesnt help my theory about mini people working INSIDE fat machines to go away. You know. Like in Men in Black. They have ETs inside the copy machine and shit. Well maybe we have ETs in our fat machines as well. Maybe they got pissed at me for not having the exact change that day and thus making them work extra ...

Mmm, i'll make sure i'll have the exact change next time :)





PS: i'd be fat in no time if i was working in the office every day of the week. Bloody fat machine...

    

Saturday, May 29, 2010

No Car, No Work, No Money, No Problem


If only ... i mean if only it was "no problem".

My car just quit ... It quit its daily job with me. No 2 weeks notice, no warning, no break up letter, not thank you, not even a little love, nothing. It basically just said: you know what? i'm outta here. And now i'm on foot again.

OK, there HAS been some warning in the past. The oil light winking at me, the engine accelerating on its own, engine over-heating ... I've done some patching on the way, refilled the empty oil tank twice, try not to push the engine too hard (got 2 speed tickets in the process) and royally ignoring the oily smell that was coming from my dear beloved car. I never even DARE to open the hood to check what was going on. What a terrible car owner i am. Between that and the dust ... UF.

Well today i went to buy some stuff at Home Depot to start my painting on Sunday (and to pay my Nth speed ticket at the police station right next door). And as i was walking toward my parked car, i saw fresh clean oil glowing from under my car. And i was like, ok now this can't be good.

So i dragged myself to the mechanic close to home (after driving 20 minutes obviously, i'm not gonna leave my car far from my house, no kidding), told him what's going on (my car is spitting oil and accelerating on its own). He popped the hood open, told me off, said it's at least 2 days worth of work, $500 USD to fix it and that no, i can't move the car from here, i've already dropped half of my oil, by the time i get home the engine might just fall off (and obviously, THAT would end up a tad more expensive to fix).

Godammit !

And i thought today was my lucky day ... i just had won a free bottle of coke at a scratching game at McDonalds.

Well, i always said i wanted to sell my car and start walking more, or bicycling more. I am a firm believer of the fact that things always happen for a reason. Looks like it's a clear sign ... So yeah, i'll fix my car in order to sell it, keep the money to keep on fixing my house, buy a nice ass bike, even a scooter as well for when i have to go further and screw you all with your polluting cars, your car insurance, your gaz, your tires, your speeding tickets, your oil filters, your lack of parking space and your car washings ... this is my good deed for the environment ...

I'm going green!



Guess there isnt any problem after all ... i love my new bike already!



    

Friday, May 28, 2010

Post #100

What best way to add another load of pressure on me with a title like that?

A few days ago, it was my blog's first anniversary and almost at the same time, it's my 100th post. I didnt care too much until i realized like, oh, man, #100 that's quite something. A blog i'm following just wrote his post #1000. I was in awe. I mean if i keep that pace of mine, it'll take me 10 years to get to post #1000. Jajaja. Not too sure if i'll have enough material to keep writing for that long but oh well.

So yeah.

Post number ONE HUNDRED.

You know what? I have NO inspiration whatsoever, i've been losing sleep over that for the past few days cuz i have had a few people asking me, uuu what are you gonna write about on your 100th post? I mean this must be an important one? And i was like i dont knoooooow! Aaaargh, help! It's just a number. Moreover, i know of 3 more people who actually read what i write, 3 guys (who would have thought), 3 guys who always comment about my writing, either through email, or comment, or on Facebook or directly and i dont want to disappoint them with a crapy post. Not that i am not doing just that right now ...

I could have written about my new house, about my dog and the new playground i found for her, about my speeding ticket (8th one), about the creepy window guy who's hitting on me in the most obvious way, about my constant running nose (seriously, how much liquid can something as small as a nose produce?), all about what as happened to me over the past 12 months of blogging, about how much weight i've lost over the past few months, about how one of my ex boyfriend thinks that we MUST have sex again (dude if i always find an excuse not to it's because you're not the last Coke of the world),  about how tough it is for me to leave without a sink or a proper kitchen for at least another week, about me being fickle, about you not being here with me, about how asocial i tend to become, about my next tattoo, about how much i enjoy being alone in my new house, about all those things that bother and annoy the crap out of me and how much i enjoy bitching about it all ...

... but somehow, nothing seemed fit enough for a post supposedly this important.

SO THERE. You have it. My crapy 100th post. It's done, i'm over with it. Now i can finally rest. No more pressure for a least another 900 posts. Life is good again.





PS: what? #500 is also an important one?
Oh crap.

Monday, May 24, 2010

Women


These words are not mine ... but they kinda shook the feminist i have in me ... Girl power at its best :)

"Whatever you give a woman she will make greater!!!
Give her sperm, she will make a baby.
Give her a house, she will make a home.
Give her groceries, she will give you a meal.
Give her a smile, she will give you her heart.
She multiplies and enlarges what she is given.
So if you give her crap be ready to receive a ...ton of shit ... "



Sorry guys, couldnt help ... Jajaja. But you have to admit it's HIGHlarious ....

Saturday, May 22, 2010

If Life Was A Movie ...

... I would now be hoping in my bad-ass red Ford Lobo, drive like a maniac to Plaza Caracol, slam open the door of Iusacell's office, pull out a big-ass fully loaded machine gun, shoot in the air, ask for everybody's attention, go toward one of the motherfuckin' ejecutivo, put a 45mm against his head and tell him, out loud (so all of the other useless motherfuckers in that office could hear how pissed off i am):

"YOU are gonna fix my BAM and my internet connection NOW. I will not leave this office until you either FIX IT or REPLACE IT with a brand new one. Nobody is gonna leave this office until i get the service i am paying for.
Am i clear?

AM I CLEAR ?? "

And i would then sit comfortably on the chair in front of the Iusacell employee, not allowing anybody to answer the phone, to deal with the other customers, to talk or to even look at me. I would shoot someone in the knee just to calm my nerves. I would wait until i got what i came for. And i would then say:

"See. It wasnt that complicated now wasnt it?"

And then i would add, just before i'd step out of the door:
"If i EVER get a problem with my connection again, i will come back here and i will shoot you all in the eye"





PS: did i say how pissed off i am?

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Happy B-Day

Today, my blog is ONE YEAR old ...

And yes i am proud of myself :D

Still 3 posts shy of 100 ... But still ... not too shaby ;-)






PS: can't believe some of you still haven't read one single post of mine. You should be ashamed ...

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Feels Like Home

I have now been living in my new house of 5 days and every single moment that i pass here in my new environment, makes me feel more and more at home. Actually, it's more like a trip back in time, back to my childhood, when i was still living with my parents in the middle of nowhere. There were no noise, nobody around. Just birds singing, chickens from the next door farm and the wind in the trees. Peace and quiet 24/7. And i'm realizing this is what i have here. I can sit in my living room or in my garden, and it's quiet. There are no noise at all. Not a whisper. The only difference with France is that from time to time, the gaz truck is passing in the street. Or i hear the neighbor shouting at his horses (i have stables next door). Those are different sounds than the one i used to hear. But apart from that, everything is the same as it used to be when i was a little girl. No wonder i feel so relaxed and chilled. I'm in the exact same environment as when i was 10, when i was careless and carefree. How much better does life gets?

There is still a lot i want done in my house as well as in my garden. There is a lot i can do myself and will do myself over the summer since i'll have a lot of free time on my hands. But there is also a lot i need to pay to get it done and i'm gonna have to be patient again. Cuz low season is only but starting.

I actually dont really care. I realized that this place is just the perfect place for me, the place i needed to be in to finally find some peace of mind. I dont think you realized the impact YOUR found has is having on me. Even i didnt realized it until i finally moved in.

Thank you, from the bottom of y heart.






It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me
It feels like I'm all the way back where I come from
It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me
It feels like I'm all the way back where I belong

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Me and ... The 3 Chickens


As most of you know already, I contracted a moving company to take care of bringing my stuff from my old house to my new one. Made my life so much easier. So when their truck got here, I opened the double doors that give access to the garden where I have enough room to park like 10 cars (that’s why mine is sleeping outside jajaja) so they’d be closer to the house to unload my big bulky heavy stuff. Problem is, when they got the truck in, 3 chickens that were hanging out on the street ran inside my garden.
I don’t like poultry. I don’t like birds. They scare me. Roosters, chickens, peacocks, parrots, pigeons, pheasants, turkeys are some of the many I can’t handle. There is obviously a reason behind it. It is a long story probably well worthy of a post of itself when I think about it. Maybe later …
So there was I, with 3 chickens in my garden and I thought, oh fuck, what am I gonna do with those chickens now? Then I tried to forget about it and focus on more important stuff to do, such as unloading the truck! And I then thought about Niki and knew she would take care of it. 

Well.

W E L L …

When I brought her here later that day, she was a bit confused and overwhelmed at first, and was following me all over the place, not really investigating anything. But then she saw or sniffed the chickens and I was like oh god, oh god, oh god.

Hearing chickens crying their lungs out in fear or stress and seeing chickens flying, or trying to fly creep me out. I mean big time. And I was worried that she’d kill one cuz then I would then have to touch it to throw it away and this is something I just can’t do. I know it’s stupid but I can’t. Just the THOUGHT of it gives me goose bumps. I think it’s just gross. One day in my old house, a pigeon killed itself against one of my window and lay on my lawn for like a week before I found someone to lift it up and throw it away.

But anyway, so there we are, Niki chasing the chickens, me not really caring too much about it (or at least trying not to care about it too much) and sweeping the floor of the house when one of the chicken ran inside the house. I mean bloody bird ran INSIDE the house. Birds scare the crap out of me, especially when they’re out of their natural environment and trust me, a chicken in my living room is exactly that: a bird outside its natural environment. Of course, it hid in between my boxes and suitcases and stuff. And I was like fuck, fuck, fuck, if this chicken is not out by the time I go to bed, I’ll sleep in the car. There is NO WAY I’d sleep in the same room as a chicken on the loose. NO FREAKING WAY. And worse thing of it all is that I knew there were another 2 hiding somewhere on my land.

My salvation came with the electrician who was supposed to be coming that evening to fix a switch that didn’t work. He came with a friend of his. And I told them, listen, I don’t mean to be a pain or a pussy or to ask you stuff that you didn’t come here for but I am shit scared of birds and I have 3 chickens on my property: one INSIDE, one behind the washing machine outside and one running all over the place. So please, please, please, help me. And they did. I forgot in what box my camera was otherwise I would have taken pictures of those 2 guys I’ve known for like 4 minutes chasing the chicken in my house.
When they finally managed to catch the last one and throw it back on the street, they were both soaked in sweat, both laughing their eyes out (because I mean come on, they come to fix a switch and end up chasing chickens) and one of them even said: damn, I haven’t been catching chickens in a long time!! No kidding. WHO does that anyway? Oh don’t tell me you did that as a kid, even back then there would have been no way I’d have touched a live chicken. A duck I wouldn’t mind at all, I even like ducks. But a chicken? HELL NO.

The funny thing about my irrational fears, like my fear of birds for example, is that when I think about it in the aftermath, I really think the whole situation is hilarious. I mean if I hadn’t had the visit of the electrician I would have honestly look for someone on the street to come kick them out. It’s like if an iguana was getting in. There are stuff like that, fears like that, that are so irrationally anchored in me that it gets the best of me and I just can’t do anything. Like when the chicken got in, I had the broom in my hand and I tried to push him out but that scared it even more and I was screaming in horror and laughing at the same time, laughing at my own pussiness, and the stupidity of it all. I mean I know the chicken is not gonna do anything to me. Well in such situation, I actually think about a LOT of stuff that the chicken could do. But anyway.

Now the 3 chickens are gone. They’re still wondering outside my gate, since it’s a dirt road in front of my house but I don’t think they’ll be stupid enough to get back in. Yet, they are chickens so considering the size of their brain, it might happen again.




OH DEAR, now I have a crying kitten right outside and Niki is throwing herself at the door, hoping that it'll blow open to rip that little motherfucker apart. One thing is for sure though, nobody is gonna get in with a dog like that!




My Life Weights 3.5 tons


Quite a few weeks back, i started the long stressful process of moving. I decided to sell my house and buy a new one with a bigger land. I needed the space. I also needed the quietness. In the house i used to live in, i had houses stuck on every side, neighbors unbearably loud and a mini garden at the front where i couldnt do anything without everybody knowing. I was FAR from everything so very dependant on my car. And that bothered me. Big time. All of this did. More than anything, my neighbor's TV. And the fact that i didnt have a place to lay out in the sun without anybody watching. Ok, ok, everything ended up bothering me.

I grew up in a tiny village in France, in a house built in the middle of the woods and with no neighbors. NONE. The only noise i could hear was the birds and the wind in the branches. So having to listen to telenovelas or banda all day on my days off, there comes a moment i just couldnt take it anymore. So for my own sanity, i decided to look for something else. Some place else.

And with Tim's priceless help, i found the perfect place.

When you're moving, obviously, you have to pack. And if there is something i suck at, it's packing. It's not even that i suck at it, but i HATE it. With all my soul. So when we agreed, with the ex owner of my new place, that he would give me the keys on friday, i quickly calculated that i had 10 days left to pack my life. And in my head, 10 days = eternity.

3 days before i was going to move, i actually started. I was like, ok i really dont have much stuff, it shouldnt take me more than a few hours. 3 hours later i was like, ok i DO have shit loads of crap and i should have started packing a loooong time ago. But no, i know myself and i always leave everything till the last minutes. Especially if it's something painful like that. And let's face it, packing IS painful.

My death sentence fell on Thursday around noon. I had decided to contract a moving company in order not to depend on friends showing up or not to help me but mainly not to worry about anything ... that's their job, they have the guys to lift up my heavy stuff and the hability to stuff everything in spaces so small i couldnt even fit comfortably. And those people told me: we're coming to load the truck on Friday at 11am.
Mental arithmetic ... i have 23 hours to finish packing. And trust me, i wasnt even close at that time.

I went to bed at 3am on Thursday night, frantically packing to meet the deadline. I was thinking on not going to sleep at all but i thought ok, zero hour of sleep to move my life, even if it's just 15 kilometers further south, i am not gonna make it. No way. No freaking way.
So i went to bed. For 3.5 hours. Or so. Woke up, took my last breakfast there, didnt enjoyed it one bit and kept packing.

Moving guys arrived at 11am ON THE DOT. I already liked them. If there is something i really cant stand is people being late. So there they were, loading my shit. I asked them if i could help them with something and one of them said: no, no, just sit down and watch.

Packing for me, was quite a challenge. Not that it's tremendoulsy complicated but it brings a whole lot of various emotions: on one hand i was excited to start a new life, in a new place, a place i know has huge potential and where i'll have the space i was craving for and on the other hand, moving all my life brought back memories and some kind of nostalgia, remembering all the good things that did happen in that house i was leaving. So when ALL my stuff was IN the truck, i stared at it for a second realizing that yeah, my life, my entire life, fits in a 3.5 tons truck...

Adios Nayarit ... Piti-City HERE I COME :)


Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Here We Go Again


It's that time of the month again.

So back off, fuck off and DIE ... preferably painfully ...
















(or come back in 5 days)


  

Sunday, May 09, 2010

Ever Wonder ...

... why the sun lightens your hair but darkens your skin?
... why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed? (FYI, i can)
... why don't you ever see the headline "psychic wins lottery"?
... why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
... why is that doctors call what they do "practice"?
... why is that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on "start"?
... why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
... why the man who invests all your money is called a broker?
... why is the time of the day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
... why isnt there mouse-flavored cat food?
... who tastes the new and improved dog food?
... why didn't Noah swat those 2 mosquitoes?
... why do they sterilize the needle in lethal injections?
... why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
... why the call the airport the terminal if flying is so safe?

And last but not least ...

If "con" is the opposite of "pro" ...
Is CONgress the opposite of PROgress?

That's it for today ... Hope you enjoyed ...


  

Only In America ...

... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
... are there handicap parking places in front of a skating ring.
... do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
... do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries and a DIET coke.
... do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counter.
... do they leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put all the useless junk in the garage.
... do they use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so they won't miss a call from someone they didnt want to talk to in the first place.
... do they buy hot dogs in packages of 10 and buns in packages of 8.
... do they use the word "politics" to describe the process so well: "poll" in Latin meaning "many" and "tics" meaning bloodsucking creatures.
... do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.


  

Interesting Items

There are some good sides in packing your life to move ... You can clean up your living environment of all the crap you've been accumulating over the year and you can also find interesting stuff like this piece of paper that i've decided to copy here (so i can trash the hard copy).

Enjoy (with my comments about it ... obviously)

* In the 1400's, a law was set forth in England that a man was allowed to beat his wife with a stick no thicker than his thumb. Hence we have "the rule of thumb". No kidding.
* Many years ago, in Scotland, a new game was invented. It was ruled "Gentlemen Only, Ladies Forbidden" ... and thus the world GOLF entered into the English language. Sexist bastard. No wonder why most women think golf is boring as hell.
* The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were Fred & Wilma Flintstone. O_o
* Every day, more money is printed for Monopoly than the US Treasury.
* Men can read smaller print than women can. Women can hear better. Jajajajaja, now is that the reason why we tend to know everything???
* Coca-Cola was originally green. Ewwwwwww.
* It is impossible to lick your elbow. Why would i want to do that anyway?
* The state with the highest percentage of people walking to work is Alaska. Ah. I thought they dog-sled! (sorry couldnt help!)
* The percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28% (now get this ....)
* The percentage of North America that is wilderness: 38% (i'm in shock).
* The cost of raising a medium-size dog to the age of 11 is $6400 USD (holy mother fucking christ, what do you give your dog? Diamonds in champagne glasses? Golden teeth! What is wrong with you people! Get your priorities straight! Raising my dog, if she lives 11 years and if i keep doing it the way i do (and trust me, she is well taken care of) will cost me $3500 USD. I mean it is HALF of that amount! That's a huge difference!)
* Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
* The first novel ever written on a typewriter was Tom Sawyer. Always thought it was the Bible but maybe it doesnt count as a "novel". Oops
* The San Francisco Cable Cars are the only mobile National Monuments. Who labelled a car a "monument"? Oh dear.
* Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from History: King of Spade is King David, King of Hearts is Charlemagne (whom every child in France hate since he's the one who made school MANDATORY ...if i remember my history classes from elementary school!), King of Clubs is Alexander the Great and King of Diamonds is Julius Caesar. Amen.
* 111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321. OMG, WHO find that one out?? Seriously WHO took the time to find that one out?
* In a park, if a statue of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in the air, the person died as a result of wounds received in battle. If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes. I studied that kinda things in art classes and absolutely loved it.
* HALF of ALL Americans live within 50 miles of their birthplace. Well that explains a lot.
* Most boat owners name their boats. The most popular boat name requested is Obsession. And when you talk about a ship, you say "she". Mmmm ... I'll shut up on this one.
* If you were to spell out numbers in English, how far would you have to go until you would find the letter "A" ... ONE THOUSAND. Well hope you enjoyed that completely useless piece of information and hope you didnt lose time counting up to 1000.
* Bulletproof vests, fire escapes, winshield wipers and laser printers all have one thing in common: they were all invented by women. Oh yeah.
* Honey is the only food that doesnt spoil. Yet they HAVE to put a use-by date cuz you never know ...
* Father's day is the day there are more collect calls than any other day of the year. Que gacho.
* In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes, the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase: "good night, sleep tight" (i really love to find out where those weird crazy funny expressions are coming from).
* 4000 years ago, it was the accepted practice in Babylon that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month, which we know today as the honeymoon.
* At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow. I did! Did you?




And the last one for the road ... I know it looks weird but please, go ahead, you can read it.

I cdnuolt blveiee taht i cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht i was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid aoccdrnig to rscheearch at Cmabgride Uinervtisy, it deosnt mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can slitl raed it wouthit a porbelm. This is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef but the wrod as a wlohe Amznaig huh?



  

Thursday, May 06, 2010

The Ash Cloud

Something a bit unusual happened today at work. We were all standing on the pier, checking people in for their tour when all of the sudden, something weird started falling off the sky. We all noticed at the same time and the first words that came out of our mouths were:
WHAT THE FUCK?

It's only after a few seconds of this unexpected "rain" that we realized it was SOOT. I mean what is wrong with your funnel you guys? Do you have to do it now? I mean it's covering everything like a rain of ash. And there are no volcanos close by, less of it all one erupting.

Bloody little pieces of soot go everywhere. In your hair, in your eyes, in your nose, on your clothes, in your bag, every-fucking-where. I even found some in my bra when i got home and took a shower. I mean i dont hang out on the pier in my underwear! How the hell did that got in there?

The shore excursion manager of the ship called the bridge to ask what was going on and he got the following answer:
"- oh, we're sweeping out the funnel ... why? did anybody complain?
- well yeah, the operators are complaining and i am complaining too!
- oh, if it just the operators and you than we dont care it's ok"

So i only have 2 words for this guy:

FUCK
YOU

Now that my entire stuff is covered in fucking soot cuz you decided to clean your funnel in port instead of at sea, what am i gonna do? Sending you the dry cleaning bill?

I WANT MY MONEY BACK!

Monday, May 03, 2010

How Old Are You Again?

A few days ago, my best friend and neighbor Nahomi invited me to a bbq at her house. I really like going to her parties cuz i dont have any traveling time to do!! We literally live next to each other !! Her husband's speciality, or maybe i should say ONE of her husband's cooking speciality is manta ray, and that's what was on the menu that night. And jeez does that taste good!

Nahomi and i have been working together for almost 6 years now and been friends for pretty much the same amount of time. So obviously, we do have a lot of friends in commun and obviously, a lot of those friends work with us.

Well that evening, one of my ex boyfriend was there. Well actually a few of them were there but that particular one, i hadnt seen or been around him in quite some time. We nastily split up a couple of years ago, then became friends again, then destroyed our relationship over stupid stuff and both kinda moved on with our lives. Or so i thought.
I dont hold the grudge with people. And since we had such a great friendship and connection together, i actually thought it was sad to end up not talking. But that was his decision and if that was going to help him moving on, then i could only but respect it.

What i wasnt expecting though, is that he would actually act like a 5 years old all evening, turning his back on me all the time. He actually arrived within a group of 5 people, 4 of them all greeting me upon arrival, one of whom i didnt know but he presented himself to me, we chit chat for a few minutes and that's it.

When he arrived, he did not look at me once, he didnt say hi and every time i was changing position, moving around to talk to everybody, he was making sure to give his back to me.

WHAT THE FUCK?

I mean, i understand you dont want to talk to me anymore, i understand our split has been rough on you and that it took you quite some time to accept the fact that we wouldnt be an item anymore, that i didnt nurture love feelings for you any longer but i mean COME ON. You're a grown man. You have a girlfriend. You're THIRTY YEARS OLD. Get over with it already.

I'm not asking you to ask me how i am, to spend the entire evening small talking to me. Just a polite good evening, acknowledging the fact that you saw me and are ok with it, acting like an ADULT, not like a 5 years old who's still pissed off 2 years later for not getting the last candy bar at a birthday party.

I dont need you in my life, nor will i lose sleep over this. But how immature is that? I was genuinely shocked. And disappointed in a way. Just like today when i realized my boyfriend i split up with some 3 weeks back doesnt have the balls to tell me he's dating someone else already. I mean what are you guys expecting? That i'm gonna voodoo you into some horrendous pain for not worshiping me for ever and ever?

What is wrong with you people? Get a grip, move on and act like grown ups. There is nothing more pityful than adults acting like kindergarden kids.













"Act your AGE, not your SHOE SIZE"