Friday, July 24, 2009

Leven Als God In Frankrijk

How clearer could it be ??? I mean HOW clearer could it be if even the DUTCH got it right away ?? Oh yeah, for those of you, like me (jaja) who don't speak dutch fluently, it means "happy like God in France". Tantantan!
HAPPY LIKE GOD IN FRANCE ...

So now we do know something ... that God does take some time off (if i can allow myself a little comment on that part, considering how shitty the state of the world has been, maybe He should reconsider that part ... even though we all agree that we all need some time off every now and then) and that out of ALL the countries there is to chose from, He chose FRANCE. Even if we've been elected (for the 3rd year in the row - aren't we proud) the WORSE tourists there is. Of the world. We're the worst. Well, apparently, God Almighty doesn't seem to think so ... It must be the croissants ... or the cheese ... no no ... the bread. Oh my, french bread ... I could kill for french bread right this second. Crispy out-of-the-oven baguette with butter. I will have that please. What do you mean it's not on the menu? Listen mr-waiter-i-know-the-menu-by-heart-and-baguette-and-butter-is-not-on-it, i am french so i'm supposed to be a complete pain in the ass of a tourist, a champion at it on top of that, even though i live abroad i still own a french passport thus still own my crown of a pain in a butt get me my baguette and butter and period.

Non mais. On va pas se laisser emmerder non plus, c'est quoi ce bordel?

Anyway ... back to our topic ... back to the dutch. Yeah well, god and the french were not really the topic i wanted to talk about initially. jaja. I wanted to talk about the dutch. Well, duh, the title is in dutch. What were you expected? A short piece about the french? Naaaa! What for? We're the worse there is. For a lot of things. But we thing we're the best. And so proud of it all too! And now we have a president with a Napoleon complex who married a giraffe. But that's another story.

So back to the dutch. They make good bread too you know. Obviously not as good as we do but hey, in Europe, they're as close to good as they can be. And their croissants too ... Uf ... Ok, enough food torturing memories, i am completely digressing from the topic here.

I once read - or maybe someone told me - that in Europe, the dutch are the happiest people there is, that they have the lowest suicide rate in the entire community. I know you're all gonna say that duuuuh, they have legalized marijuana in 1976 (yes i studied my topic jeje) that's why they're happy little fellows ("little" being an understatment since most of them are sky high people!). Well maybe a joint help not being depressed and help to be happy (i have my doubts about that but maybe i'm digressing again) but i think the main reason dutch people are happy is this:
Oh yeah. Bicycle. THE dutch bicycle. In french, a bicycle has a nickname, it's called "la petite reine", the little queen. Hell yeah. The dutch have a queen, they ride a little queen, what more can you say. So in my opinion, THIS is the reason why the dutch are so happy. Believe me or not but in the street, you dont see traffic jam with cars, you see bikes everywhere. At the train station there is a car park for bikes only (not too sure it's called a bike park ...). They have traffic lights for bikes, special lanes for bikes, special parking spots for bikes, special roads and streets JUST for bikes, special equipment for bikes. It's shinny? people are biking. It's raining? people are biking. You're young? you're biking. You're old? you're biking (when you're too old, you ride your motorized wheelchair on the bike lanes). You go to work? you're biking. You go to the movie? you're biking. You go pick up someone on a date? you're biking on your tandem bike. You're skinny? you're biking. You're fat? well you're not dutch but try to look like one (and you're miserably failing at it since dutch are not fat) You have a baby? you're biking. You have a dog? you're biking. It's just amazing. Amazing and awesome.

And i'm telling you, they're happy biking. But i mean REALLY happy. I have been there, i have checked every single person (but i mean EVERY SINGLE PERSON) riding a bike and they're all smiling. ALL of them. I didnt see one single exception. And on top of that, they smiled at me too! Like they were telling me "hey, stop walking, hop on a bike and enjoy a fun ride".

Well i didnt ride any bike cuz my ride was more fun than any bike ... But i am convinced now that biking is one (if not THE one) path to happiness.


I wonder how good they're doing at the Tour de France!


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